I have always considered myself to be a writer. A daydreamer. A believer. Connected with quintessence…to a degree.
That is why I created this blog in the first place–to allow my thoughts to become words, and to allow those words to decorate some space in the world wide web.
Then I thought to myself, “I’m a writer. I write poetry. I hope to have my novel published one day. This blog will be great to get a reading audience!” That thought was even lectured to me at a Life, the Universe, and Everything Conference (a huge fantasy writing conference in Utah). They said if you ever hope to be published as a writer, you have to have a reading base first.
Thus, I tried to commercialize my blog–write to the reader.
Well, teachers know what happens when you teach to the test…you start losing yourself. Losing the goal in mind, losing the personal aspect of it all, losing your creativity, your style, your imagination, your soul. The same goes for blog writing.
I’ve realized that, especially thanks to Danica’s post on the whole “Competition” aspect of blogging. I lost track of why I really wanted to blog in the first place. All for more page views and more followers. I guess it was mainly because my friends like Danica, or Sierra who are my age, just starting to teach like me, relatively newlywed, etc. But they have waaaaaaaaay more followers than me. It’s true, the green monster has decided to occupy my mind.
Why can’t I have as many followers or as awesome blog posts as them? Is it because I am a teaching intern? No, they both teach too, and one of them is an English teacher and has to read a lot more than I do. Is it because I am married? Well, they were both married long before I was.Is it because they have instagram and probably Macs and Iphones? Possibly. Is it because they are just better writers than me? ………………..maybe……… Is it because they know a lot more about fashion than I do? Probably. Is it because I am still a novice in the blogging world even though I have had my blog for 3 years and 2 weeks? Yes.
So, I have a few things to work on:
- Learn more about Mormon fashion (or use what I have and become more creative) as well as break out of my bubble of self-consciousness and post maybe a few teaching outfits?
- Write more often (I can start by doing creative history writing assignments along with my students). No, write every day. Become dedicated with this!
- Carry my iPod around with me more and finally figure out how to set up Instagram.
- Find a niche. I like that I am very widespread with my posts, but I want to find a series of something that is consistent and that I enjoy.
- Research. History or English is fine. But technology? Blech. I’m going to have to swallow that fear and resistance.