Trusting in God

My husband is a private person. I am not. If up to me, I’d tell the whole world my entire life story. But, my husband is a bit more decisive on what he likes or wants to share. I know bloggers who are completely transparent about their personal lives. My husband prefers to draw a line in the sand between our personal lives and our blogging lives, and sometimes I like to flirt with that line.  However, I feel this time should be handled differently. And, as much as I’d love to write more for therapy and support, I highly respect my husband. So, all I’m going to say is this:

I’m very sorry I’ve been absent from social media for a while. In the same short time period, we have received some wonderful news for our family as well as some devastating news affecting us directly. Justin prefers to keep quiet about both for now, and I’ll will follow that request.

But, timing is a butt. It truly is.

I know the apostle Paul once said that he “glories in tribulation”, but to be completely honest, I am sick and tired of all the trials Justin and I have been given in our almost 4 years of marriage. We’ve had our fair share, I feel. The worst (before now), was right before Rhys was born…we hadn’t found a place to live yet and Justin hadn’t found a job yet. I wanted to give up having faith that God would provide for us. But, just at my lowest point, God spoke to me and answered my prayer. In a fatherly tone, he then commented, “See, I told you.”

I’m trying really hard to keep that lesson in mind right now. But, even though I want to give it all up, wallow in pity, and say “woe is us, we are destined for a lifetime of disappointments,” there is a small spark of hope left.

Yesterday, while trying to figure out a scripture to post for my #sharegoodness Instagram post, Proverbs 3:5-6 kept coming to my head:

Trust in the Lord with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding. In all thy ways acknowledge him, and he shall direct thy paths.

God is trying to teach me the same lesson. I’m afraid of making light of our situation, which should not happen. But, I’m trying my absolute hardest to not doubt. The Lord does have a plan. He will help us. I may not understand when or how or why He is doing it the way He is, but He requires and demands my trust. I want to give Him that trust. Things will work out for the best for our family in the end.

So, if I am not super responsive or present on any social media, or light-hearted and jovial, please be patient with me as Justin and I try to navigate the next few weeks.

Tayler is a work at home mom. She does free lance articles and dabbles in graphic design and virtual assisting for bloggers. She spent 3 years as a history and English teacher. Her passions are her husband, two children, history, reading, nature, and her Savior, Jesus Christ.

  • Kari Koehler

    I’m sure as a regular blogger it is hard for you to not share things on your blog! But sometimes I think some bloggers (not you) are quick to share all news, good and bad, without pause. If you decide to eventually share anything from this time in your life on the blog I’m sure you’ll have some hindsight and a better ability to process it. I know some people like their blogs to be “of the moment” and find waiting to share things less authentic, but I disagree. At the end of the day, you are a person in a marriage and you have to do what’s best for your family even if it affects your blog. Kudos to you for realizing that no reader is owed every tidbit of your life- there are many bloggers that could learn from you. Hopefully these trials are just a season of life and remember that you are still young and have so many years ahead! I know that’s so hard to realize in the moment, but all you can do is weather the trials and try to learn from them.

    • It’s an interesting mix because I wear my emotions on my sleeves and have no qualms about telling the world my life story, but my husband is the opposite…I guess that is one of the best things about our marriage!

  • I’m so sorry you guys are going through even more tough stuff these days. Keep on keeping on! I’m glad you have each other and your faith in this time–hopefully it’s a season that won’t last too long–but I know even when it’s past, the tough stuff of life can leave scars.

    • Thanks, Rachel. We’re chugging along, and *think* we can see a light at the end of the tunnel right now!

  • You are in my prayers!

  • I definitely believe that God has a plan for each of us that is bigger and better than we could ever imagine. It’s tough to have the patience and the faith in the midst of those trials. Keeping your family in my thoughts and prayers as you navigate this time.

    • That’s what we believe too. However, in the moment, it’s hard to think that way. But, we still have hope.

  • You’re in my thoughts.

    • Diolch yn fawr, Llinos!

  • I’m sorry you’re going through a hard time, Tayler. I’ve been thinking of you.